i was thinking today (as it's tuesday, which, as everyone knows, is the only real day to get good thinking done. you can't on wednesday cuz you're torn between trying to be optimistic, "only one day until friday and after that it's the weekend!" and trying not to kill everyone, "god-fucking-damnit why is it only wednesday?!". thursday's no good cuz you've realized that tomorrow is friday and there's a shit-load of work you haven't done. friday, well it's friday. that's the day you wander around to other people's offices and bitch about how long the week was and how you're so glad it's almost over. saturday's spent nursing the horrible hangover you incur friday night, celebrating that the week was over. sunday, you take care of all the things you should've taken care of on saturday but couldn't, while also cursing that you've wasted your weekend doing jack-shit and have to go back to work tomorrow. and everyone knows about mondays. so, you see, all you really have is tuesday. that unassuming, oft-forgot day of the week where the next weekend is too far away to really be bothered with and the previous weekend has already been purged from your memory.)
so anyway. i was thinking today and i've come to the realization that i'm a fucking hermit. seriously. i think if it were left up to me, i'd never leave my apartment. i'd just sit there all day, reading books, smoking, and talking to my cat. this is probably not a good thing.
it's not that i hate everyone or even most, it's just that i usually have nothing to say to someone. i think this might stem from my lack of common ground with most people my age. i couldn't give a fuck less about tila tequila, i'm not a huge reality t.v. freak, i'm really just not a huge fan of t.v. in general (which seems to be the bulk of what people talk about.) and it seems like every show i do like and might actually talk to someone about, gets cancelled. dead like me? i fucking loved that! i watched every show.
social situations just don't work for me. guys mostly come over to see if they can fuck me and girls tend to just glare at me. and i don't like it when people who don't take the time to talk to me, dismiss me because i'm not unattractive. it tends to piss me off. what usually happens is that i'll have a few drinks and talk to the handful of people i do know until that one fucker who just doesn't understand that i'm not interested gets really annoying and i'll leave. i end up passing the night drinking coffee and reading. so now i just bypass all that bullshit and go straight to the anchor.
also, my monday through friday 9-5 schedule is at odds with most of my friends. they're either in school or working, usually at restaurants or retail stores.
i was gonna finish this but i'm tired of bitching. i'll be extra-specially nice tomorrow to make up for today. i promise.
3 comments:
well that's a fun little rant. did you take your depakote today?
sorry. that's a little crazy person humor. unless you really are bipolar, in which case...... i'll shut up now.
bipolar? hmm, not that i'm aware of. not that that means anything...
the crazy ones often don't know they're crazy until it's too late....
i see nothing wrong with hermitage. being one myself though calls into question my impartiality on the subject.
there are just fewer and fewer people in the world whose presence i can stand for more than 5 minutes. even i'm starting to get on my nerves. even my dog is getting a little too uppity for my liking.
i suppose my point is that you're not alone in your disdain for all people. well, technically, yes, you are alone.... but now you're just parsing words.
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